Touch is the most information dense form of communication. Words and language are critical for understanding. But thats exactly where words fail us, as they are just too slow and ponderous and are not universal. We have to come to sharing languages that defines personal differences. Indexing by the valences of gender or bias, we are enjoying a renaissance of communication. People are now learning to better understand differences in linguistics and style. (Well, we can dream can't we.)
Identifying and respecting personal boundaries takes tact. Knowing or learning how to respectfully approach others is a matter of profound sensitivity. If and when we are actually touching each other, a whole new series of instincts and intuitions come into play. The standard ritual of shaking hands is a beautiful place to start. Open handed and firm or are you just given the fingers? I like to feel the whole hand. Skin firm and tight or is the hand soggy and mushy like mash potatoes? Many of the biggest most muscular guys have this characteristically self indulgent skin on their palms. Moist and sensitive or dry and callous? Do they pull back quickly or do they enjoy that moment of contact? As we will be having the time to be getting to massage therapy after all, we'll be able to work from the initial sensitive encounter toward a deeper understanding of "Intuitive Touch."
Let me talk about one of the most common processing errors we are prone to. Intuitions can easily be confused with fantasy projections, good and bad. (Commonly mistaking mirroring projections with a reversed referential index, causing blaming.)
Anecdote: Two shy people, (perhaps you and me,) notice each other. We are both decent respectful people. Not wanting to be rude, we both try to ignore each other. I can't help but notice you are way out of my league anyways. And even though you may be alone, you are probably much more popular and confident than me. (Projection) I've always resented those people who have to be the center of attention anyways. (Myself included.) The one thing that most of us never realize is even beautiful people can be very lonely too. There is an overwhelming probability that the very person you are noticing, at one time or another feels exactly the way you do. If that person is attractive, that person has probably heard every stupid line. They've seen every stupid jerk off arrogantly throw themselves at them; male, female, young or old, rich or poor, we all have seen people act like idiots in the presence of beauty or power. This is where a sensitivity of tact is really what most people need and want. You feel lonely being socially bored. A respectful distance may be required but as often as not, that is the wrong thing to do. That other person can be having exactly the same thoughts, ABOUT YOU. Don't assume. Look but don't stare. Even someone who has just been short with you, may respond favorably to a friendly response. And sometimes introducing is polite.
Now don't pee on yourself, and don't turn into a stalker. A lot of the beautiful people can be narcissists anyway and that's just ugly. But what I am saying is some of the kindest people you will ever meet are beautiful and they shouldn't be judged prematurely just because of their appearance alone.
Confidence building can give you the "Touch." Rapport is largely a matter of tact. As with any type of new learning experience there is a learning curve. Even what seems to be the straight forward proposition of a "Touch Training," is so fraught with nuance and subtext that the whole thing sounds like an insulting waste of time. Don't get bogged down in excuses. People who already know you, may not be the best for exploring new social skills. But then again, if your friends are "becoming" people, (growing and learning,) they may like exploring the touch of a person who is just learning too. Be honest and if necessary clinical, we are just learning. The secret to learning and mastering intuition is trust. And just like sincerity, you can't fake trust. You can be wrong about who to trust but you can't fake real trust. No where does this become more obvious than in the looping interplay of touch.
As I have chased away all of my psychic reading customers, I now have the time and energy for my work as a massage therapist. My work with pain management usually involves imagining what others are feeling as I stroke and massage deep connective tissues. Like as I mentioned, I don't find the experience easy for me, giving or receiving. But it has saved my life and sanity. While keeping me out of a wheelchair and in the gym, I was overjoyed discovering that I'm not the only person who is lonely for touch. Being a Satyr and an ecstatic, I had overwhelming concerns about touching people. After my separation from my "X" in "92," and my diagnosis of of partial paralysis from wry neck syndrome, I gave up on intimacy. I was in my fifties before I even considered dating again. It had been for over 15 years that I had avoided touching anyone.
It has come to my attention that the specific technicalities of psychic reading (Often it's a Fine Art of Bullshit, not without useful applicability.) is better documented than the sensitive art of intuition. When most people talk of the "intuitive" they in fact are referring to just meta formal logic, or ease of usabilty. As my documentation for the implicit structures of meta formal logic processing has been clearly outlined, I believe it is my responsibility to move on to the issues that are much more pertinent to the understanding and application of intuitions. When a product is marketed as being "intuitive," it's intended to be easy to understand. I know from looking at my own writing that what may seem intuitive to me isn't always intuitive to others. Often my arguments and intuitions are sensible to me only. But I'm getting much better at speaking and writing clearly.
Trusting yourself can be wonderful stuff. If you want to be able to trust your intuitions, "You may have the touch."
No comments:
Post a Comment
Is there anybody out there?